Shonny Schwartz
Haf you seen mine leedle Shonny,—
Shonny Schwartz,
Mit his hair so soft und yellow,
Und his face so blump und mellow;
Sooch a funny leedle fellow, —
Shonny Schwartz?
Efry mornings dot young Shonny —
Shonny Schwartz
Rises mit der preak off day,
Und does his chores oup righdt avay;
For he gan vork so vell as blay, —
Shonny Schwartz.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Yankee Shrewdness
In a little country village,
Not many years ago,
There lived a real "live Yankee,"
Whom they called "Old Uncle Snow."
In trade he had no equal;
And storekeepers would say,
"We're always 'out of pocket'
When Snow comes round this way."
'Twas the custom of the villagers —
Few of them being rich —
To trade their surplus "garden-sass"
For groceries and "sich".
One store supplied the village
With goods of every kind,
Including wines and liquors
For those that way inclined.
A counter in the "sample-room"
Was fixed up very neat;
And after every "barter-trade"
The storekeeper would "treat".
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Zwei Lager
Der night vas dark as anyding,
Ven at mine door two vellers ring,
Und say, ven I ask who vas dhere,
"Git oup und git" — und den dey schvear-
"Zwei lager."
I says, "Tis late: schust leaf mine house,
Und don'd pe making sooch a towse!"
Dey only lauft me in der face,
Und say, "Pring oudt, ' Old Schweizerkase,'
Zwei lager."
I dold dem dot der bier vas oudt;
But dose two snaps set oup a shout,
Und said no matter if 'tvas late,
Dot dey moost haf "put on der schlate!
Zwei lager.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Sequel to the "One-Horse Shay"
Doubtless my readers all have heard
Of the "wonderful one-horse shay "
That "went to pieces all at once"
On the terrible earthquake-day.
But did they ever think of the horse,
Or mourn the loss of him,—
The "ewe-necked bay" (who drew the "shay"),
So full of life and vim?
He was a wonderful nag, I'm told,
In spite of his old "rat-tail";
And, though he always minded the rein,
He laughed at the snow and hail.
He had the finest stable in town,
With plenty of oats and hay;
And to the parson's oft "Hud-dup"
He never would answer neigh.
To the parson's shay he was ever true,
Though her other felloes were tired:
To live and die with his fiancée
Was all that his heart desired.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Hans and Fritz
Hans and Fritz were two Deutschers who lived side by side,
Remote from the world, its deceit and its pride:
With their pretzels and beer the spare moments were spent,
And the fruits of their labor were peace and content.
Hans purchased a horse of a neighbor one day,
And, lacking a part of the Geld, — as they say, —
Made a call upon Fritz to solicit a loan
To help him to pay for his beautiful roan.
Fritz kindly consented the money to lend,
And gave the required amount to his friend;
Remarking,—his own simple language to quote,—
"Berhaps it vas bedder ve make us a note."
The note was drawn up in their primitive way, —
"I, Hans, gets from Fritz feefty tollars to-day;"
When the question arose, the note being made,
"Vich von holds dot baper until it vas baid?"
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Vas Marriage a Failure?
Vas marriage a failure? "Veil, now, dot depends Altogeddher on how you look at it, mine friends. Like dhose double-horse teams dot you see at
der races,
It depends pooty much on der pair in der traces; Eef dhey don'd pool togeddher righdt off at der
shtart, Ten dimes oudt off nine dhey van beddher apart.
Vas marriage a failure? Der vote vas in doubt; Dhose dot's oudt vould be in, dhose dot's in
vould be oudt:
Der man mit oxberience, good looks und dash, Gets a vife mit some fife hundord dousand in
cash,
Budt, after der honeymoon, vhere vas der honey? She haf der oxberience — he haf der money.
Vas marriage a failure? Eef dot vas der case, Vot vas to pecome off der whole human race? Vot you dink dot der oldt "Pilgrim fader?
vould say, "Who came in dot Sunflower to oldt Plymouth
Bay,
To see der fine coundtry dis peoples haf got, Und dhen hear dhem ask sooch conondhrums
as dot?
Vas marriage a failure ? Shust go, ere you tell,
To dot Bunker Mon Ilillument, vhere Varren fell;
Dink off Yashington, Franklin, nnd "Honest Old Abe" —
Dhey vas all been aroundt since dot first Plymouth babe.
I vas only a Deutscher, budt I tells you vot!
I pelief, every dime, in sooch "failures" as dot.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Little Tim's Revenge
"Little Tim " was the name of him
Of whom I have to tell;
And he abode on the Western road,
In the busy town of L--.
As trains went down through the little town,
He peddled through the cars
His stock in trade, — iced lemonade,
Cake, peanuts, and cigars.
Conductor Dunn was the only one
Who'd not this trade allow;
And so 'twixt him and little Tim
There always was a row.
At last one day they had a fray;
And Timothy declared
He'd "fix old Dunn, 'as sure's a gun,'"
If both their lives were spared.
So off he went with this intent,
And sold his stock in trade:
His earnings hard he spent for lard,
And started for "the grade."
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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A Highly-Colored Romance
Ben Green was a New-Hampshire boy,
Who stood full six feet two:
A jovial chap this same Ben Green,
Though he had oft been blue.
He loved a girl named Olive Brown,
Who lived near Bixby's pond,
And who, despite her brunette name,
Was a decided blonde.
"A Highly Colored Romance."
A pink of rare perfection she,
The belle of all the town;
Though Ben oft wished her Olive Green,
Instead of Olive Brown.
And she loved Ben, and said that nought
Should mar their joy serene;
And, when she changed from Olive Brown,
'Twould surely be to Green.
She kept her word in-violet,
And vowed, ere she was wed,
Although when Brown she had Be(e)n Green.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Dot Baby Off Mine
Mine cracious! mine cracious! shust look here und see
A Deutscher so habby as habby can pe!
Der beoples all dink dot no prains I haf got;
Vas grazy mit trinking, or someding like dot:
Id vasn't pecause I trinks lager und vine;
Id vas all on aggount off dot baby off mine.
Dot schmall leedlc vellow I dells you vas qveer;
Not mooch pigger roundt as a goot glass off peer;
Mit a bare-footed hed, und nose but a schpeck;
A mout dot goes most to der pack off his neck;
Und his leedle pink toes mit der rest all combine
To gif sooch a charm to dot baby off mine.
I dells you dot baby vas von off der poys,
Und beats leedle Yawcob for making a noise.
He shust has pecun to shbeak goot English too;
Says " Mamma" und " Papa," und somedimes "Ah, goo!"
You don'd find a baby den dimes oudt off nine
Dot vas qvite so schmart as dot baby off mine.
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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Ravenous Bill
Oh! a terrible glutton was "Ravenous Bill,"
Mate of the good ship "Whippoorwill;"
And seldom it was he could get his fill;
A fact he oft would mention.
And many a time, when eating his beef,
Would the captain tell him to "take a reef;"
But to such requests he ever was "deaf,"
This being a bone of contention.
He cheated the sailors out of their prog,
Nor left e'en a scrap for the captain's dog:
He was such a gourmand and terrible "hog,"
That he'd" eat you out of your house."
He thought no more of a leg of ham,
A peck of potatoes, and shoulder of lamb,
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poem by Charles Follen Adams from Yawcob Strauss and Other Poems
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